The author: Rob Walker
Date: March 18, 2017


Credit Gracia Lam

I recently interviewed with two human resources representatives for a job as an executive assistant to the chief executive of a big company. Both were in their mid-20s. (They gave their ages.) Within five minutes, one pulled out his phone and began scrolling, and texting or emailing, occasionally looking up and making a comment before going back to his phone. Even when he asked a question, he sometimes focused on his phone.

I wanted to say, “I can see that my talking is interfering with your scrolling, so I can wait.” Or to smack the phone from his hand and leave. Afterward, the other H.R. rep escorted me to the elevator and dropped several F-bombs in “conversation.”

I’ve never experienced such unprofessionalism. (Not to mention I was in a suit, and they were wearing jeans and T-shirts.) If their rudeness reflects the company as a whole, do I really want to work at such a place?

I understand that “kids” nowadays (I sound like my parents) are addicted to their phones and feel comfortable in their setting — but this was ridiculous. Maybe I should have just left, but it was very frustrating. What advice can you give if this rudeness should happen during a future interview? J. K.

In defense of young people nowadays, or any time: They’re not all the same. I can attest to many conversations with 20-somethings who did not look at their phones. And I’ve encountered people a generation older who definitely seemed to think their devices were more important than nearby humans. What you experienced was a variety of rudeness that transcends demographics.

But it was, of course, completely unprofessional, and your basic instinct was correct.

The person who really needs advice in this situation is the C.E.O. Surely he or she does not want the organization represented in such a haphazard, indifferent way, with H.R. representatives belittling potential employees and sending them back into the world with a thoroughly negative view of the entire enterprise. Throw in casual explicit language, and the message these workers are sending is: We do not take this business seriously, so why should anybody else?

A job interview isn’t just a forum for a candidate to be judged. The interviewee is — or should be — also forming judgments. Do the company’s reps seem competent? Does their demeanor or presentation hint at the company culture? (Jeans and T-shirts aren’t inherently bad, but they may suggest a workplace different than what you seek.) Such impressions can hardly be decisive. And who knows, maybe this was all a fluke and the job would have been terrific. But some signals are hard to ignore.

As for the specific problem of conversing with someone who is zoned in to his phone, maybe just try more lightly saying, “I see you’ve got something going on there; I’ll wait.” That doesn’t need to be confrontational (you can say it with a sympathetic smile), but if you make it clear that you’re not going to talk while your interviewer’s attention is elsewhere, the message ought to be clear.

If he can’t manage to proceed as if the conversation means something, then it probably doesn’t. In which case, do your best to wrap it up — and show yourself to the elevator.